Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Slaves: Jekyll and Hyde Poem

Author's Note: Through this poem I wanted to portray the message that we are all slaves of evil. Whether we like it or not we will always be surrounded by it. Evil, in any form it comes in, is always lurking around the corner to envelope us and there's no way we can escape it. In Jeckyll and Hyde I got the sense that evil was unavoidable and we are all slaves to it, so my goal was to share that sense with readers through this poem.

Slave

Head down and walk forward
Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot
The rhythmic pattern becomes in sync with my racing pulse
There's no turning back now, this is the only way home.

Walking in a dark hour as so;
an hour no foot should be wandering,
is a dangerous task, only made out of desperation.
These streets are no place for a vulnerable girl like me,
but still I continue...
Head down and walk forward
Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot.

The slight breeze that meets my skin on the back of my neck assures me that the world isn't dead.
sending a chill down my spine, the wind's cool taste on my lips awakens my awareness.
However, something is not right.
The dark sensation of this wind sends a swarm of fear into my stomach
But still I pace on...
Head down and walk forward
Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot

At first I pass by the suspiscion of this wind,
but not until the next gush meets my flesh do my senses come alive.
The thick air consumes my body,
making it a struggle to breathe.
And still I walk on...
Head down and walk forward
Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot

The next gust hits my back and my body is overtaken.
The humid air dehydrates every thought from inside of me
disrupting my rhythm, the raging fog is dragging me backward
And still I pull through...
Right foot...left foot... .... .... right foot...

The force is overwhelming,
the sensation, demonic.
The cloud of darkness on my back fully consumes my body,
the pressure in my head is increasing by the second.
Piercing, high screeches are filling my ears,
and there is no escape.

Pushing against the force I enable myself to turn around,
to face it.
Slowly, with all of my strength I push against the dark wind.
It pushes me back,
but still I go on...
Head down and push through
Right foot! Left foot! Right foot! Left foot!

And...WOOSH!

My body is weak.
Powerless.
Empty.

Laying cold against the concrete sidewalk I push myself up from off the ground.
While lifting my head, my eyes don't meet with a dark, mysterious wind
Or a dark, demonic creature
But only my reflection.

A dark and wooden mirror stands before me.
I stare into my reflection to see myself standing wearing tattered, black clothing
My eyes are dark
The smirk on my face is unbearable
And wrapped around my leg is a chain.

I lift up my hand and touch my face
Surely enough, my dark reflection follows
I look down to assure I am still in my own clothes
A sigh of relief escapes my body

The girl in the mirror is surrounded by darkness and blazing fire
I stare into the unknown distance behind her and almost feel bad for her
If only I could let her escape for just a moment so she could experience freedom
But then I remember...
This girl is me.

As I remain still the girl in the mirror screams and pounds on the glass,
No longer following my motions
I take a step closer and try to understand what is happening
Looking back with terror she is fearing a presence that is drawing near

Then it appeared.

The very dark wind that brought me here is about to torture my own reflection
When our eyes meet, I see her paralyzing fright
But there is nothing I can do.

As the dark wind slowly covers her entire body I squeeze my eyes shut
Watching my own self being enveloped with a demonic darkness was not in my favor
With my eyes closed I wait, wait for my reflection's pain to be over

And then everything goes quiet.
Suddenly the slight breeze I had just felt on my skin is now scorching heat.
I hesitantly open my eyes and see my new surroundings.
I am now trapped in a burnt field of fire and panic overtakes my body

Running around the field I receive a glimpse of hope when a shimmer of light comes in sight straight ahead.
Pushing through the ashes and blistering flames I burst through...
Head down and sprint,
Right foot! Jump! Left foot! Right foot! Jump! Left foot!

I finally reach the light that gave me the sensation of relief,
but that is all crushed when I see what the glimmer truly is.
It is only the light reflection of a mirror.

A mirror with a dark, wooden frame now stands before me and all I can see is my reflection.
In the mirror stands a girl in a dark street wearing a school uniform.
She meets my eyes and flashes a malicious smirk.

My new reflection turns around and skips away.
Leaving me with the fire, evil, and the dark wind.
A new awareness of something cold touching my skin arises and I look down to my feet,
There lies a chain around my ankle, imprisoning me to this place.

The dark wind approaches me with its usual dark sensation,
Reminding me of our first encounter
It circles me and then takes off into the burning field,
This was my cue to follow

The burnt earth blisters the bottoms of my feet,
But still I walk on...
Head down and walk forward
Drag right foot...drag left foot...drag right foot...drag left foot.

I am nothing but a slave.








6 comments:

  1. Wow Abbey, this was absolutely amazing! I love the repetition of the line "head down and walk forward, right foot, left foot.."! Your show don't tell was also very strong, I felt as if I was stuck in the thick, hot air; great job! The only thing I could think of changing would be in the second part, maybe break up some of the lines so they aren't so long. Overall, it was great and I loved the repetition of the poem as a whole--kind of like on both sides of the mirror!

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  2. Abbey this is absolutely beautiful. You're wording is so powerful. You have a great act for seeing what you want to say in your head and explaining it just right so the reader can see it, I totally admire it! I agree with Allie, the repetition was so effective, it kept bringing me back to the situation you were explaining. I love reading your pieces! Wonderfully done.

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  3. Wow, I absolutely loved this! I love how you took it from a simple poem in the beginning to a more intense and short-story like poem in the end. Your repetition of "right food, left food" was really powerful as well! Maybe next time you could have more heavily saturated diction. But I loved reading it, good job.(:

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  4. Just wow. Ab, you are an incredible writer. I'm speechless right now. The ending is shocking but sooooo awesome!!!!!! You are such a good writer, keep up the good work! There's honestly nothing I could do to improve this, the only thing is maybe add some rhyming or cool word rhythm or something like that but the emotion in this is so powerful! Awesome, Perfect, Amazing, INCREDIBLE!
    Love, Studly

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  5. this is just amazing. I love how you added way more to the end than when i first read it. I loved how you went from walking to then dragging your feet at the end and repeating the left foot right foot stuff. I got so excited when I read it that i reread it three times. The story was amazing and so was the idea behind it. You portray evil so well. I admire you as a writer so much because you just get in your zone and you won't let me talk to you... anyways, this was phenominal!

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  6. Wow. I wish this was Facebook so I could like this a hundred million times. Abbey, this is just so deep and heartwrenching. I loved it so much. The only thing, (which now I'm just being picky) is instead of saying, "heart wrenching grin", you could say "malicious smirk." Just an idea! Loved it though overall... Keep up the good work!

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